[Oh. Oh shit, she really is from some other time, other place. A future where he gets to meet Yelena instead of only hear about her. A future where he told her what happened to Natasha.
It's still fresh. The gaping hole where she used to be. Still actively bleeding every single second of every single day. For a few moments, he looks so lost as to what to do, how to react. Devastated, even. It had been so hard to tell the others, to even try to explain. His jaw flexes a few times, like trying to work out the words to say.]
I'm sorry, [with the slightest bit of break on the word] that you had to hear it from me. [Who else? He was the only one that was there. He's the only one that can carry the true knowledge, no matter how he words it, no matter how he tries to phrase anything, no matter what picture he attempts to paint.] Must've sounded a couple shades of insane.
[How else do you say 'there was a floating noseless red-skinned guy in an apocalypse cloak acting as the crypt keeper who knew our lineages, and then we sat and tried to figure out how to game the system for a few hours, and then we fought about who got to kill themselves and skip out on the consequences--'
There are simpler, gentler, and just as honest ways to talk about it. He isn't being very kind to himself. He doesn't deserve to be.]
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It's still fresh. The gaping hole where she used to be. Still actively bleeding every single second of every single day. For a few moments, he looks so lost as to what to do, how to react. Devastated, even. It had been so hard to tell the others, to even try to explain. His jaw flexes a few times, like trying to work out the words to say.]
I'm sorry, [with the slightest bit of break on the word] that you had to hear it from me. [Who else? He was the only one that was there. He's the only one that can carry the true knowledge, no matter how he words it, no matter how he tries to phrase anything, no matter what picture he attempts to paint.] Must've sounded a couple shades of insane.
[How else do you say 'there was a floating noseless red-skinned guy in an apocalypse cloak acting as the crypt keeper who knew our lineages, and then we sat and tried to figure out how to game the system for a few hours, and then we fought about who got to kill themselves and skip out on the consequences--'
There are simpler, gentler, and just as honest ways to talk about it. He isn't being very kind to himself. He doesn't deserve to be.]